i got the most relatable spam email
My dog sent this
he is a man of fortune
1 reblog = 1 bountiful blessing from the man of fortune
The way this entire can of coke fits exactly in this coke glass
It’s 1am and i had a solid minute where I stared at this and thought someone had peeled the coke
A guy goes into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says, “that’ll be a dollar”
The guy thinks, “man, that’s cheap,” but the beer was delicious. So he finishes his beer and decides to take a chance. “Bartender, I’ll have your finest wine” bartender goes through a long process of showing the bottle. Opening it. Aerating the wine. Pouring it into nice a nice glass and says. “That’ll be 50 cents”. The guy can’t believe it. So he thinks ‘fuck it ’ and says “I’ll have a whole bottle of your best scotch “. The bartender hands it to him and says “here. On the house”. Curiosity finally gets the better of the guy. He asks “ok. Where’s the owner” bartender replies “upstairs with my wife”. The guy asks “what’s he doing upstairs with your wife?” And the bartender looks the man in the eye and replies “same thing I’m doing to his business”…
Hey Jeff, change your url please.
69 days until avengers 4
20 days until Captain Marvel
139 days until Spider-Man far from home
as of the 16th of February 2019